Be careful what you wish for

Four months has come and gone. It was a blessing being able to stay at home and watch both my boys on a daily basis. There were days when I wished I could go to work just to get a break and now that I am back at work all I wish is to be home with my sons. I am blessed to have family who is able to watch them while I am at work. It makes me feel more comfort vs. having them in a daycare. However, I feel like I am letting them down by not being there for them 24/7. The struggles of being a mother and choosing/having to work. In some ways the boys will be better off by having a great relationship with their Grandmother and Nana. Also, the time we spend will be more quality time vs. quantity time with not so much quality. Plus they will build a strong relationship with their father because he will have one on one time with them when he gets home from work until I get home.

I am definitely cherishing my time with my boys more than ever.

Time = Change

In the blink of an eye I became a wife and then the mother of two wonderful boys. Now that it isn't just me anymore it seems as if time passes by so quickly. I find that I rarely stop all the running around to enjoy that I am married. With two boys only 15 months apart I find that everything I do is for them. My husband and I are getting lost in the daily routines and planning ahead. I am a planner I feel more in control if I know what is going on. It drives my husband nuts and yet he is more than happy to let me take care of things. I say I want him to take over some of the responsibilities but then I complain about how he goes about it. This is something I am working on. My mother says it is hereditary. Each day is a challenge. Relationships take work and when you have kids that means taking more time to do the work. I am commited to doing the work and making the time. I want to make sure we put our family first before work,friends and even extended family. Stop and take the time to enjoy the little things. Something as silly as trying to go to the bathroom and Nathan keeps pushing the door open, which could be annoying but instead it cracks him up because I pretend he scared me while sitting on the toilet. Even after the 10th time his giggle had me laughing. Another favorite moment today is when Gary was holding Evan and I look over and see Evan so close to a full on giggle for the first time because his daddy is making goofy noises to entertain him. I could have missed that because I was to wrapped up in getting laundry done but I slowed down and didn't miss that important moment. Again, I am commited to slowing down and doing the work to enjoy life so that my husband and my kids will enjoy it too.